Grammy Awards Shmammy Awards

This I wrote for this week's Vista. It wasn't printed this way though. Keep in mind, I'm a member of the Recording Academy. They just don't let me vote...

And the Recording Academy wonders why no one watches. Quick synopsis: the Police reunite to play only “Roxanne,” but the Eagles get a medley. (Don Henley was Person of the Year, I suppose). James “You’re Beautiful” Blunt was shut out, and there was much rejoicing.

Mary J. Blige finally won, and Best Rap Album went to Luda. Gnarls performed dressed as pilots and won two including Best Alternative Album, but lost out on Record and Album of the year to the Dixie Chicks. Seriously? “Crazy” dominated airwaves for a good six months, and well let’s face it, costumed rockers are just plain cooler.

Rick Rubin produced every album released last year, and Tony Bennett thanked Target in his acceptance speech. The Doors, Joan Baez, and the Greatful Dead were actually recognized with Lifetime Achievement Awards after four decades of snubs. “My Humps” beat out actual music for Best Pop performance, and the Academy failed to have a James Brown tribute. Come now, he was the Godfather of Soul.

Granted, the target audience is the marginal music fan, and the voting members of the Recording Academy are less than hip to the great under publicized hip-hop, pop, and rock in the world, but would it kill them to try and give awards to those who deserve them? Carrie Underwood over Chris Brown? The kid can sing. And dance.

Also, the Grammy’s have traditionally provided a stage for innovative collaborations. Eminem and Elton John, Melissa Etheridge and Joss Stone belting Janis, James Brown and Usher, Paul McCartney and Jay-Z; all exhibited partnerships of extreme talent and creativity. The Grammy stage is ripe for creative acts of a caliber that can’t be achieved anywhere else in the world, and they missed the boat. The 49^th will be known for lackluster performances, zero creativity, and well, its profoundly soporific effects.

If the Recording Academy wishes fans to donate to the myriad of wonderful causes they support, they could at least throw us an entertaining party for a night. Maybe they were just saving up for the 50^th .